~ Nightshade Beauty's Poison Pen~: This Week in High Fashion: We'll Always Have Paris...and you know I mean the "real" one.

This Week in High Fashion: We'll Always Have Paris...and you know I mean the "real" one.

Today at 9:28am

Dear Paris Fashion Week:I love Fashion Weeks...if I needed an excuse to not pay attention to my day job...they would be it.But you, Paris, are the cream of the crop. Models who made it through the hazings of Milan and the craziness of London, glide into Paris on wings made of silk, quaaludes and cigarettes...God I love you, Paris.You could allow purposely ripped stockings to come down the runway and I would still let you call it Fashion with a capital F.

What did I see this week Paris? I see crazy space helmets, Valkyrie hats, some messed up bouncy shorts, some really...ugly...fabric..., CRIMPED BANGS (!)....and AGAIN I have to say it...even to you, Paris...WTF is up with the bare faced model trend??!!! I know it's a global recession and everyone is cutting back, but are you JOKING ME??? You can crimp their bangs but you can't paint their faces??? Electricity is more expensive than foundation and maybe a little eyeliner?

The Makeup Industry will NOT allow you to do this to us, Paris...noooooooo no!First Gaultier, and now YOU?

I feel lost, betrayed, hurt, confused...but I still love you so.Where is my wine....Paris, I love you...really I do...

And so...I give you...RUNWAY PORN!!!

Gareth Pugh...I LOVE THISBut I also have a strange obsession with hats and feathers on the runway. I think this is a hat, it might also be a very very high collar...does it matter? NO! Why? Because it's AWESOME.

Gareth Pugh Spring/Summer 2010Gareth, your models look like re-animated dolls...I LOVE IT. I see red eyeshadow, I see pale foundation, I see fun purple braided hair messes under that babuska hat...I love it.

Lie Sang Bong Spring/Summer 2010Lie Sang Bong goes to space...but this hat also looks a little like half of the Manhatten Project...but I could be wrong.Either way, I also see spaced out makeup...shimmery green/blue cheeks...I love it when a runway has a story, even if it's all messed up like this one surely is.

Lie Sang Bong as part of his Spring/Summer 2010Bad shorts and helmet hair are the order of the day. I totally appreciate the space-feel of his collection, really I do...but booty shorts are a let down when there is no booty to be found. Space Pirate Fail.

Indian designer Manish Arora's Spring/Summer 2010 OK....I LOVE the bead draping and the head/face beading(!)...like super love it...but WTF is going on with those shorts...is it an optical illusion? Stare at her crotch long enough and it looks like a great pair of shorts? I'm not getting it...I was never good with the Magic Eye posters either...

Hiroko Koshino Spring/Summer 2010Hiroko Koshino likes innocent demure models.Hiroko Koshino likes big giant hats that look like they're made of paper or Queen Elizabeth I's neck ruffles.Hiroko Koshino also likes BARE FACED MODELSI say NO!

Limi Feu Spring/Summer 2010 See...now I can see eyebrows here...but thats about it...I'm sorry Lima, you picked some uuuugly models...this is the only one I'm posting...because seriously...damn...This is Paris...not Barcelona.